Combines Combine or harvesting jokes

[Camaro92Z]

The local red combine salesman stopped the other day to sell me the all new Rotary combine. He was showing me how it all works sitting in the driveway with everything running when my old tom cat ran across the drive and right into the header! Oh my Goodness, I said, that poor cat, and then he shot out the spreader without a scratch that I could see. I told the salesman that heck, I'm not interested in that rotary combine cause it couldn't even thrash grain if it didn't even harm my cat. He then climbed up to the grain tank and proceeded to show me the two seeds from that tom cat. WOW, I'M SOlD, I'll TAKE ONE NOW!!!!!

 

[Bar]

Q.what do you get when you cross a tr99 with a 2388IJ A.two broken combines

 

[All_colours_turned_Yellow]

This farmer went in to see his family doctor and was waiting word on his recent tests. The doctor was very sorry to tell the farmer he only had a month to live. The farmer asked the doctor if their was anything he could do. The doctor told the farmer to go to his nearest John Deere dealer and get himself the latest, biggest, most technologically advanced combine they had to offer and hire himself out to custom harvest a 1000 acres of grain. The farmer replied back, " Is that going to help me"IJ The doctor said, " PROBABlY NOT, BUT ONE THING FOR SURE, IT'S GOING TO BE THE lONGEST MONTH OF YOUR lIFE"!

 

[Grain_Reaper]

How many bankers does it take to grease a combineIJ Three-if you run them through real slow.

 

[Tomato_Worm]

What do you get if you cross a TRS 80 and a TR 86IJ A Compu-Bine!

 

[Tim_nj]

I asked a neighbor, a Gleaner owner, for a combine joke, and he said "Oliver 7300". Guess that's what he had before . . . .

 

[GUMBAllGRAIN]

DID YOU KNOW IF DOllY PARTON WAS A FARMER SHE'D BE FlAT BUSTED

 

[BradHunt]

That was a pretty expected comment to find in a group of a bunch of Cat boys. Why don't all of you hit your back browser button and enter the JOHN DEERE talk show to hear about some real combines.

 

[BradHunt]

That was a pretty expected comment to find on a website full of a bunch of Cat boys. Why don't all of you hit your back browser button and enter the JOHN DEERE talk show to hear about some real combines.

 

[Vikes]

John Deere has a new combine, who did they copy this timeIJ